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Jokes
May 12, 2008 8:53:00 GMT -4
Post by Rag Doll Zombie on May 12, 2008 8:53:00 GMT -4
There should always be a joke thread in a forum.
An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, “Ah, you’re an engineer — you’re in the wrong place.” So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy. One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, “So, how’s it going down there in hell?” Satan replies, “Hey, things are going great. We’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there’s no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next.” God replies, “What??? You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake — he should never have gotten down there; send him up here.” Satan says, “No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I’m keeping him.” God says, “Send him back up here or I’ll sue.”
Satan laughs uproariously and answers, “Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?”
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Jokes
Jan 16, 2009 13:35:59 GMT -4
Post by Aikawa on Jan 16, 2009 13:35:59 GMT -4
486 - The average IQ needed to understand a PC. State-of-the-art - Any computer you can't afford.
Obsolete - Any computer you own.
Microsecond - The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete.
G3 - Apple's new Macs that make you say "Gee, three times faster than the computer I bought for the same price a Microsecond ago."
Syntax Error - Walking into a computer store and saying, "Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object."
Hard Drive - The sales technique employed by computer salesmen, esp. after a Syntax Error.
GUI - What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee on it. (pronounced "gooey")
Keyboard - The standard way to generate computer errors.
Mouse - An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate.
Floppy - The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer.
Portable Computer - A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on vacation, and on business trips.
Disk Crash - A typical computer response to any critical deadline.
Power User - Anyone who can format a disk from DOS.
System Update - A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.
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Vampires
New Member
I used to be love struck, now I'm just f**ked up.
Posts: 49
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Jokes
Apr 11, 2009 0:56:47 GMT -4
Post by Vampires on Apr 11, 2009 0:56:47 GMT -4
I couldn't help put posting this...
Little Johnny was going to his faters house one day and he was packing everthing in his room and putting it in his little red wagon.
He was walking to his fathers house with his wagon behind him, when he came to this hill.
He started up the hill but was constantly swearing "This God d**n thing is so heavy"
A priest heard him and came out. "You shouldn't be swearing" said the priest. "God hears you...He is everywhere...He's in the chruch...He's on the sidewalk...He's everywhere"
Then Little Johnny says "Oh is he in my Wagon"
The prist replies "Yes Johnny God is in your Wagon"
Little Johnny says "Well tell him to get the h*ll out and start pulling"
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Jokes
Apr 11, 2009 11:34:08 GMT -4
Post by Rag Doll Zombie on Apr 11, 2009 11:34:08 GMT -4
haha that ones sooo old
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Vampires
New Member
I used to be love struck, now I'm just f**ked up.
Posts: 49
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Jokes
Apr 11, 2009 22:41:01 GMT -4
Post by Vampires on Apr 11, 2009 22:41:01 GMT -4
lol I don't really care
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Jokes
Apr 12, 2009 17:37:16 GMT -4
Post by Rag Doll Zombie on Apr 12, 2009 17:37:16 GMT -4
I remeber saying it in grade six to all of my friends!!
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Vampires
New Member
I used to be love struck, now I'm just f**ked up.
Posts: 49
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Jokes
Apr 13, 2009 23:00:15 GMT -4
Post by Vampires on Apr 13, 2009 23:00:15 GMT -4
lmao
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Vampires
New Member
I used to be love struck, now I'm just f**ked up.
Posts: 49
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Jokes
Apr 18, 2009 13:42:22 GMT -4
Post by Vampires on Apr 18, 2009 13:42:22 GMT -4
It is old
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Swarm
New Member
"Glory to the Powerful! Power to the Swarm!"
Posts: 40
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Jokes
Nov 20, 2009 21:35:09 GMT -4
Post by Swarm on Nov 20, 2009 21:35:09 GMT -4
I could put a lot of copypasta up, but most of it's in varying degrees of dirty. Is that okay, or should I only put up censored things?
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